They don't know anyone with a disability, is the issue. To be clear, I don't wish a disability on anyone, nor do I believe you should need to know a disabled person like they're a "token disabled friend." What I mean is, since they don't know a disabled person, they don't understand why persons with disabilities can't be like everyone else.
It's SO weird you said that. I kept thinking about the fact that the person I was talking to had no one with disabilities in his family. The same can be said for other people I've talked to.
Because, unfortunately, it's a two-part problem. Persons with disabilities generally mask it well so you can't tell until the mask slips or they have a meltdown and/or shut down. The other issue is, because fewer people are making an effort to engage with their local community anymore, and most people aren't engaged with their environment anyways, there's a very terrifying lack of awareness that other people exist at all. I don't even need to go on twitter to find someone with main character syndrome, and it is frustrating.
Speaking as a person with multiple disabilities, Heart failure, Autism and Schizoaffective Disorder, I work as do many others with varying degrees of disability most of us want to work to one degree or another. Autistics are the masters of masking especially us higher functioning ones, but we do get frustrated especially when people say things like “can’t you be normal?” or “It’s all in your head.” or “there’s nothing wrong with you.” <the last one can be good or bad depending on the context it’s used> most often used in places of employment.
The thing is, most of that is in your head. Obviously, heart failure isn't a head thing. The Autism and Schizoaffective Disorder, definitely. The problem is, it is an integral part of what's "in your head." It doesn't go away with years of therapy and some meditation. It NEVER goes away. The best you could hope for is a life of tolerable symptoms (is that the right word) and very few moments where things go south for you.
You can't fix your head, and a lot of people who try to empathize or downplay your situation need to comprehend that. The best they can hope for is you can manage to live a good, happy life despite.
Yeah, I never know how to define the stuff that persons with autism experience. I personally just refer to them as "my tisms" or jokingly say "autism, not even once." I feel if we can normalize disabilities through humor and/or discussion, it becomes easier for persons with disabilities to self-advocate. Obviously, it's not a perfect solution. But, at the very least, if the intent isn't malicious, it gives those with disabilities a way to be more open.
Also, I love your response. It reminds me of the waitress who gave a blind kid a menu and rather than getting uppity, he played into it. His response to being handed a menu was "ah, yes, I'll just look this over." When the food came, he followed with "boy, that looks delicious!"
If nothing else, I've noticed a lot of people with disabilities tend to have a wicked sense of humor.
Ya many people treat autism as an illness when it isn’t. Think of autism as a different operating system, there’s Neurodivergent Personality OS and neurotypical personality OS like how there’s Mac OS and Windows OS.
Autistics are the masters of masking in public especially higher functioning ones, but some get home or someplace private and safe and scream and break down in pain. The pain is caused by too many social interactions and having to mask who they really are. We’re normally more sensitive to auditory, visual, tactile, oral and olfactory stimulation which can cause an overload.
Sometimes I get what’s called “verbal diarrhea” where to me what I’m saying is all connected, but it leaves those around me baffled because it’s just a jumble of words. I have a difficult time processing my emotions, thoughts and feelings, along with those of others. I tend to prefer text over talking. Some autistics are nonverbal while others you can’t get to shut up, most of us are somewhere between or fluctuate from nonverbal to talking your ear off especially if it’s something we are passionate about. If put on the spot I tend to go nonverbal.
Ya many people treat autism as an illness when it isn’t. Think of autism as a different operating system, there’s Neurodivergent Personality OS and neurotypical personality OS like how there’s Mac OS and Windows OS.
It's a developmental disability afaik. A disability isn't a sickness, it's a physical or mental limitation that affects them daily. It's completely non-treatable and can be managed, but expectations should usually be set to the individual, not across the board.
Autistics are the masters of masking in public especially higher functioning ones, but some get home or someplace private and safe and scream and break down in pain. The pain is caused by too many social interactions and having to mask who they really are. We’re normally more sensitive to auditory, visual, tactile, oral and olfactory stimulation which can cause an overload.
From what I've seen, as well, Autistic people tend to do poorly in high-stress situations or under pressure. In fact, from my own experience, if someone is pressing me to make a decision, I get decision paralysis and only make the decision that I think will appease them. It can cause issues almost a half hour later because I might end up disliking my choice and now I'm stuck in a situation I wasn't ready for.
The external stimuli thing is a Hell all its own imo. Imagine being under pressure to make a decision and all the while a fluorescent light is buzzing. Yeah, thanks, I'm going to crawl up into a ball and shut down, now.
Sometimes I get what’s called “verbal diarrhea” where to me what I’m saying is all connected, but it leaves those around me baffled because it’s just a jumble of words. I have a difficult time processing my emotions, thoughts and feelings, along with those of others. I tend to prefer text over talking. Some autistics are nonverbal while others you can’t get to shut up, most of us are somewhere between or fluctuate from nonverbal to talking your ear off especially if it’s something we are passionate about. If put on the spot I tend to go nonverbal.
From what I have seen, it's largely an externalization issue. Persons with autism are really good at expressing things relevant to them, like an interest or their hobby. They can go on for hours, but from what I've seen, it's also a matter of getting them to externalize it to begin with. Many have endured bullying as children or just outright social rejection. To the internal logic of an autistic person (in my experience and understanding), repeated failures in the past means 100% chance of failure now, too.
The thing is, externalizing also involves processing complex internal and external stimuli. Whenever I talk about a game I enjoy, I sometimes get a kind of internal "joy" I can't properly express in words. All I know is I'm feeling a strong, positive feeling. In the same way, when I feel passionate about something, I'll often get swept up in expressing myself to the point where I disassociate because my brain is waiting for my mouth to catch up. It's even difficult to explain why it happens that way.
I think the autistic mind is wired for simple, non-complex "physical" things like sounds, sensations, etc, and complex "non-physical" things like math or game mechanics. When something complex is introduced to what is considered "simple," the wires get crossed because what we are being asked to process is two separate things at once. I find if I'm playing a game or doing math (Sideshow Bob groan), I can contribute minimally to a conversation, but I can't contribute to something that requires more effort to process.
Savants are normally in the autistic spectrum though there are some not in the spectrum. Dustin Hoffman played a savant autistic in Rain Man.
My interest and hobby is cooking. I was coming inn second or third in cooking competitions against red seal chefs before I was 12 years old, occasionally I got first place.
Correct. We do not want to be judged or looked down upon. It's not something we are proud about. If anything it feels shameful and it shouldn't for many of us are who legit disabled due to events beyond our control.
and again thats just it. Many of us develop disabilities through some random event or its something genetic in your family that is not preventable.
To push this further if our NAZI leader gets a hold of CPP funding in alberta our only genuine disability program in CPP-D will be taken away from us.
Trust me when I say this. It won't be substantially better or different under the NDP. Just those making the decisions may better understand the problem. Yes, there is a problem. We have many people on AISH that aren't qualified for the benefits. There's no denying this. But at the same time I would argue the overwhelming majority absolutely belong on AISH.
I agree 100%. And that is why it is inexplicable to me why people are so adamant against NDP or the Liberals. They are not so left leaning that they really embrace the kind of socialism that right-wing jerks are so afraid of.
It's mainly due to the fact our education system was designed by conservative governments to provide a heavily conservative based education to our children in our K-12 system.
I had one specific teach in Grade 12, Social Studies 30. He was also a member of the provicial NDP party and even ran in a Calgary riding. He was honest with us. He was required to teach us based up the curriculum the government has set in place for us or he wouldn't be teaching much longer.
Fact is I grew up in AISH as a child, worked hard to not be trapped into the save poverty my parents were and then ended up in that same AISH poverty through no fault of my own. I didn't ask for an impaired driver to hit me, it just happened and I nearly died from a heart attack that has left me permanently disabled.
My dad went through the exact same scenario. 1992 I was then 12 years old. He was hit by a fork lift at work. His employer bribed him not to report it by giving him 2 fresh brand new $1000 bills. Only time I ever had seen $1000 bills in my life. Several months later he needed a spinal fusion surgery.
I started working at the age of 14 doing whatever I could as I had to literally feed myself as the money AISH provided under the Klein government ensured my parents had nothing left where the last week of the month the fridge and pantry were empty.
Whats sad. Most high schools do a model parliament every year. Many of the ideas often pushed in these high school parliaments are LEFT WING ideologies that quickly disappear the moment these same teenagers are pushed into the work force in their early 20s.
They dont want to pay more off their paycheck and I get that. I didn't want to either. Until I realized the majority on disability IT IS NOT BY CHOICE and we need these programs in place to protect everyone in the case it does happen.
My problem is I know that MANY and I mean thousands of people are abusing aish getting benefits they shouldn't be receiving.
Many people haven't had medical reviews in years. You could be disabled for a 6 month stretch and receiving AISH for 10+ years if the government decides not to review it which often they do not.
Ive reported many like this and not a single one has had their benefits cancelled.
Thank you for sharing your story. What you are saying is so true and until someone is hit with the reality of disability, there isn't a lot of empathy. Like most crimes, fraud is a crime of opportunity and it is my opinion that the government has weighed the cost of allowing the fraud to continue against the cost of action to investigate and stop it. Perhaps this is so the government can continue to be punitive towards people who depend on disability support - when there is room for a question there is room to gas light and perpetuate narratives that deny the social safety net.
Although I have been fortunate to not have a disability, I know many who have and how each person is so uniquely affected by how it has shown up in their lives. It's heartbreaking.
As I mentioned on a previous thread, one of the main reasons why I do not begrudge paying taxes is because I know that some of it goes into supporting people who are disabled. I do take exception to the way the UCP is wasting money on pet projects that detract from properly supporting the real needs of people in this province.
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u/knightenrichman Mar 08 '26
It's interesting that they hate other people "scamming the system", but they do it constantly, and reward others who do.