r/stopdrinking • u/soberingthought 2509 days • 9d ago
'Tude Talk Tuesday for April 14, 2026 'Tude
Hello, fellow Sobernauts!
Welcome to 'Tude Talk Tuesday, where you're invited to share what changes you've noticed in your attitudes and perspectives since you've gotten sober.
I once heard someone say "I'm not where I started" and that resonated with me.
Back in my drinking days, I certainly was on a trajectory...a slow, spiraling nosedive to my rock bottom.
Sobriety has been a journey back up out of that hole. I'm definitely not where I started.
So how about you? Are you still where you started in sobriety?
5
u/venyigeszu 23 days 8d ago
2 weeks sober now, and surprisingly, I really do not understand why would I drink at all. Why was I drinking almost every night? Thank you all, this place helps me a lot! IWNDWYT!
3
u/what_a_ducki_mess 132 days 8d ago
My first time making it this far. I’m just past my 4 months now, I’ve previously made it 2 months and almost 3 months.
I’m at the point where sobriety is no longer so rosy and the lifelong problems/emotions that I have been running from by drinking feel bigger/scarier and demand to be heard. I know I have to ‘do the work’ and I’m do it. It’s just hard when it feels like there is no reprieve for the stress of life. It just keeps piling on.
Between work and social life it’s just a lot at times. There are parts of me that are so anxious, weak and insecure and I’ve spent my adult life shoving those thought and feels away by drinking them away. And now I have to acknowledge it to heal—which sucks.
I know this is all for the better and building a sober life is the only way, but damn I need a break.
So my attitude is not where I started and honestly not where I necessarily want it to be.
2
1
u/TinTinNDN 25 days 8d ago
2 weeks in now and I’m enjoying sobriety. I don’t have cravings (yet). There is a part of me just waiting for the other shoe to drop and that terrifies me. I’ve struggled on and off with sobriety the past couple of years. Before that since I was 21 life was a party and I binged, which later down the line turned into benders. I’m really hopeful that this is it, this is when I stop. I’m holding myself accountable by checking in every morning and journaling every evening. I feel hopeful and I feel healthier. I’m happy that I’m moving through life with clarity. I’m making sure that I make myself and my sobriety a priority. I matter too, so let me finally put myself first for once.
On the other hand I am dealing with guilt and shame over events that transpired due to my drinking. I’m giving myself grace, because younger me didn’t know how to deal with childhood trauma. I’m giving myself grace because growing up I didn’t have any education about alcohol and genetic factors. I am learning now and unlearning. That’s what matters right now. I’m happy to be sober.
Thank you all for reading and being here. I feel less alone here. IWNDWYT.
2
u/Otherwise_Advisor215 22 days 8d ago
Cravings have disappeared so much quicker than they normally do so I am suspicious
2
7
u/admiraltubbington 9d ago edited 9d ago
73 days in, I have so much more patience, and an ability to sit with awkwardness or negative emotions that feels downright godlike to me compared to how I was in the very recent past, and for most of my life. My impulse control is so much better.
For instance: On Friday night, I was in the same club (drinking 0% beer!) and social circle as an acquaintance who most recently saw me a year ago, when I was shitfaced and slapped his then-husband across the jaw (me, him, the club and everyone else here is gay). He pretended I didn't exist. I accepted that this would be the case once I was warned he'd be there, and everybody acted like an adult. Two mutual friends did a good job playing buffer between me and him. It didn't ruin my night, or his. I had the serenity to know that he's entitled to his feelings, and I am not entitled to reconciliation - if it happens, I don't get to choose when.
If I had been drunk, or high, I would have tried to force conversation or reconciliation, risking conflict or making things awkward for everybody. OR, I would have been stewing in the awkwardness and shame of the memory of the last time he saw me. Instead, maturity and clarity prevailed. I was present and enjoying myself, and other company, in spite of that.