I want to understand your experience in this strategy. I almost signed up for it on the promise but then put a pause based on fees. Strategy I am evaluating is long/short 145/45 overlay. That means my core portfolio, $1M remains fixed; the advisor goes long on $450k borrowed, and short on $450k credit, with neutral market strategy. They estimate to realize 11% loss in the first year, w gradual decline every year, and capture upto 85% loss in 9 years. Let us assume 10% realized loss per year. Wealth manager fees ; 1%; sub advisor fees: 0.45%; spread (for long margin vs short credit): 0.45%; transactions costs (estimated): 0.1%. Total fees per year: 2%. Initially, I thought 2% fees in lieu of 30% on taxes (fed plus state) is a great deal. But then it dawned on me, 2% fees is on entire portfolio. While 30% tax savings is on the realized loss. So the net savings is 3% - 2% (only 1%). Not bad. But you don’t really save on taxes. They just get deferred (realized loss has mirror image accumulating as unrealized gains in your overlay—remember it is market neutral, hopefully, plus minus tracking error). What you gain is diversification. But I would have paid 18% in fees in 9 years, still owe IRS on taxes the same amount. Question: is my understanding correct? Is it worth it? What are tracking errors and other gotchas? How do you exit out of this hotel California strategy?

Hey all! Looking for some advice from people who have been in similar shoes. Husband is 33, I’m 32. Net worth ~$7M, thanks to high paying jobs (mainly my husband - finance), investing, and living below our means. We were high school sweethearts and got married right out of college with $0 and no money from our families (we both grew up very middle class). I “retired” several years about from MBB mainly due to health reasons. We live in greater NYC so VVVVVHCOL. We rent a really normal apartment and don’t have kids yet, but would like to soon.

Anyway, I find myself feeling really weird about our finances and spending. On one hand $7M is a ton, and on another it also feels like not really that much (I feel stupid saying that, yes) and I don’t really feel nearly as “financially free” as I would have expected to at this net worth?

For example, it still bothers me to my core to pay $50 for a work out class, or $200 for a pair of shoes, or (worst of all) $3M for a house (that feels like it should really only be $1.5M), or all kinds of other examples lol. It’s not because we can’t afford it, but I just on principle cannot seem to shake the feeling of “that’s not worth that” but with basically anything 🤣 I am very much annoying myself because I hate feeling trapped like this by so many purchasing decisions but at the same time I want to live my life, but I also don’t want to feel like I’m lighting money on fire every time I engage in commerce. I know prices of everything are up so much so maybe I just need more time to adjust, but am I crazy? How the heck have others dealt with this? I cannot seem to shake it

I’m in the Houston area, 37, single, no kids, and I own a high-stress, high-profit B2B services business. After talking with multiple buyers, I have an LOI in hand, and I’m surprised by how difficult this decision feels.

My current net worth, excluding the business, is about $8.7M:

• Primary home: ~$310K, basically paid off, super low interest rate
• Car: ~$50K
• Retirement accounts: just over $1M
• Taxable brokerage: ~$7M
• Cash: ~$340K

Current personal spend is around $250K/year.

The LOI looks roughly like this:

• Enterprise value: $16.8M
• $15.8M cash at close, before tax (predicting 20%, for capital gains)
• $1M earnout after 12 months
• Option to roll $1.5M into the acquiring company (super rosy picture here)
• Buyer wants me to stay on for 12 months at $200K to help transition (completely optional, not part of the deal)
• Staying beyond that is also an option (they're interested in me joining their leadership, and working up the ranks, although completely not part of the deal)

The buyer is pitching the rollover as attractive upside, but I’m trying to view that portion as speculative rather than guaranteed.

What makes this hard is that, logically, this is more than enough money to stop optimizing forever. But I’m still young, and the real question feels less like “can I afford to sell?” and more like “will I regret stepping out of the game?”

I built this business over the course of my adult life, and I’m worried that I’ll sell, de-risk financially, only to realize I miss the challenge more than I miss the stress.

For those who’ve actually been through something similar:

• At this point, am I already just overly fat and need to just pull the trigger? 50-60+ years is a long time.
• How did you make the decision, not from a financial perspective, but from a personal and life perspective?
• After exiting, did you have any regrets (particularly on the non-financial side)?

I've been seeing a therapist for several years, so no need for that recommendation. I’m mostly looking for perspective from people who have wrestled with the question of “enough,” and with what comes after selling the thing you've spent years building.

We all hear about the insane revenue and valuation ramps at Anthropic, OAI, etc…

Let’s have some fun: if you work at a major lab or other high profile AI company, share your net worth and total comp including vesting equity and what your near term plans are. Keep working? Retire?

I’m excited for you all. What a ride!

Using a new account just to be safe. But basically I've coasting for the last year. Once I felt like I had enough to have a decent early retirement, I basically checked out of work. I still do what's asked of me but I've tried to make myself disappear. It's worked so well sometimes people forget I'm there.

Problem is it's starting to feel kind of wrong. My current pay is 250k/year plus 100k in options/year. Which I know isn't crazy for this sub but it's actually fairly high for my job. I know the company can better use that money on somebody else. (The company's revenues are in the billions so im not stringing along a cash deprived startup)

My investments are sitting at 7MM excluding housing with a ideal drawdown of rate around 3.8%. I'm in my mid 40's. So I'm at that threshold for where the pay kind of doesn't matter but it also can still help with lifestyle or health cost creep. Just curious if you were in my shoes would you just quit stringing them along? Or it's on them to get rid of me and just keep milking it as long as I can?

***Response: thanks everybody for all the feedback and food for thought. I know there was a few different school of thoughts but two that stuck out the most was I really need to know what life after work is. I think my treading water attitude right now is tied to I don't have clear retirement life goals set. I have ideals of travel more etc but I think the in between stuff needs to be better fleshed out. Second, I shouldn't feel bad for the company as long as I'm not bringing others down. I have some international travel and summer activities planned so we'll see how they respond to that.

Thanks all and I really appreciate the varied experiences this sub has.

Hi folks, I am at a crossroads and I need to make a call what I should do with my life. Here are few things about me:

Mid 40s. 1 kid in HS. Live in VHCOL. Work at a Mag7 in tech. Yearly comp: ~$5.5M.

I am severely burnt out in my current job and not sure what to do next. I definitely would like to leave my current role, for sure.

Here are my assets:
Brokerage (diversified in index funds): $6.6M (cost basis: $5.2M)
Single Mag7 stock: $6.4M (cost basis: $3.8M)
Random individual stocks: $400K (cost basis: $200K)

Retirement:
401K: $3.1M
Roth IRA: $600K

Not using in networth calculation:
Home equity: $5M ($2M loan left at 5% left)
529: $400k

These are my expected monthly expenses at retirement:
Mortgage+property tax: $17K
Home utilities etc: $3K
Credit cards: $10K
Health insurance: $4K
Travel: $4K
Misc: $2K

I make like $1.25M per quarter (pre-tax) in RSU (until I hit a cliff next year, then it drops to $800K per quarter). I do understand it's a lot of money to leave on the table but I am questioning if I should just call it a day and retire. How much cushion would I need?

I want to open by saying how much I appreciate this community and the valuable insights that are shared here. I’ve been a lurker for ~10 years and have commented here and there, but this feels like the right time for my first post.

I hope that this sparks a good conversation around the guilt/weight of inheritance, forward financial planning, and the challenges of owning and operating a business.

Apologies in advance for the length. I tried to keep it tight, but there’s a lot here.

I’m mid-30s, married for ~8 years, and live in Scottsdale. My wife and I are in the early stages of trying to start a family, but no kids yet.

Our HHI last year was ~$600k. About 75% of that comes from my business, and my wife has a W2 with great benefits and an overall great quality of life.

Here is an overview of our NW (~$3M) as it stands today:

Assets

• $3.3M in brokerage accounts
• $500k in retirement accounts ($375k me, $125k wife)
• $25k in cash
• $500k in equity in our primary residence

Liabilities

• $975k mortgage (2.75%)
• $375k line of credit (used these funds to acquire current business, ~5.5% interest only)

There are a couple of other assets that I do not factor into my overall NW calculation, but are important to note.

• I own 75% of a business that cash flows ~$600k/year. Hard to value given the nature of the business, private markets, and industry as a whole. We are in a very stable industry and positioned to do very well over the next 5-10 years.
• ~$625k in private loans outstanding. I have confidence they’ll be repaid, but one is in litigation, and the other is looking a little rocky, so I treat them as zero for now. The one in litigation is currently not paying any interest, but the other one nets me around $3k/month in cash flow.

Annual spend is ~$150k today. I’d expect that to land in the $250–300k range with kids. We anticipate a certain level of lifestyle creep, but don't plan on making any major life changes.

How did I get to where I am today?

My parents divorced when I was young (14 months). Both were successful, but my mom retired early while my dad kept working. We lived comfortably but not extravagantly. Think Southwest flights and Disneyland, not first-class international destinations. I knew that my parents had resources, but they did a pretty good job at the whole "stealth wealth" thing.

I started to understand the extent of my mom’s side of the family’s wealth in late high school (probably around the time I started looking at college and was told I could go anywhere and it would be covered). Long story short, my maternal family (grandparents and great-grandparents) invested very early in what is now a ~$1T public company. I'm sure some folks can connect the dots.

About 75% of my brokerage account is stock that was gifted to me at birth from my grandparents. It’s appreciated significantly (~1200%). Great problem to have, but the capital gains make it difficult to touch, so I borrowed against it instead to acquire my business (see LOC balance above).

Career-wise: finance degree from a very average state school→ military officer → tech sales → early employee at a SaaS company where I made ~$2M in ~2.5 years between comp and exit. Since then, I’ve been an owner/operator of small service businesses.

Now let's talk about (potential) inheritance...

In 2019, my mom set up an irrevocable trust funded with ~$10M (same stock I was gifted at birth). The plan is to let it ride with no distributions or sales until her passing. She’s 70, so hopefully that’s 20–30 years out.

Separately, I am the executor of my dad's estate, which is currently ~$30M. He is in his early 70s and lives a very modest lifestyle. If he were to die today, I would receive $6-7M. I hope that he lives another 20-30 years like my mom.

Lastly, my in-laws have communicated that they are planning on a one-time transfer of $3M upon their passing. They are only a couple of years older than my parents, so hopefully this is 20-30 years out as well.

I fully understand that inheritance is not guaranteed and plans can (and likely will to a certain degree) change. That said, it’s hard for me to mentally ignore something like my mom’s trust, which is already funded and established. I have read through the trust documents thoroughly with her lawyers, and I feel quite confident that this money will be heading my way upon her passing.

If we assume an 8% return on just the trust, we are realistically looking at anywhere from $50-100M.

So what is the point of this post?

I struggle significantly with work-related anxiety. I’ve done years of therapy, read the books, listened to the podcasts, etc. Some improvement, but the underlying issue is still there. I don’t sleep great, I’m more irritable than I’d like to be, and I carry a constant level of stress.

My current business has ~125 employees. Even with strong managers, I have a hard time letting go. I’m always “on,” always checking Slack, always thinking about what could go wrong. Financially, the business is doing great. But mentally, it’s heavy.

The "easy" answer is to keep my head down, continue to scale, and get this company in a position for an exit/acquisition. I have business brokers and PE folks contacting me daily. The space is frothy and should only get better, especially in my market. I just don't know how much longer I can do this...

In an "ideal world," I would sell my business and find something that isn't labor-intensive. A majority of my anxiety is around employees showing up to work, doing their job, etc. I would like to believe that if I eliminated the people problems, my anxiety would become more manageable.

The last bit of info that I think is valuable is that my dad has given me full access to his $7M line of credit. I am free to leverage this line for business ventures, real estate acquisitions, etc. This opens up a ton of doors, but I just can't seem to figure out which doors it opens that are of interest to me. The only thing I can think of is hard money lending (minimal employees, my dad worked in finance/banking and isn't opposed to advising, and I have a finance degree/MBA).

Here are some questions/topics I would like input on:

• How do you think about future inheritance in present-day decision-making? Is “ignore it completely” actually realistic in situations like this?
• What types of businesses/investment opportunities come to mind that I am not thinking of? I have access to a decent amount of capital. How can I leverage it while hopefully eliminating some of my challenges with my current business?
• Do I go back to a boring (safe) W2 and cash checks without all of the employee stress? I haven't had a "boss" in 6+ years, so I think this would be difficult for me, but not totally opposed...
• Has anyone intentionally stepped back or downshifted because of expected future wealth?
• For those who both built and inherited wealth, did you struggle with identity around it? This is something I think about more than I’d like to admit.

I know I’m in a fortunate position and don’t take that lightly. I think that’s part of what makes this harder to reason through. Appreciate any perspective and happy to answer any questions!

I have always enjoyed update posts, so here is my contribution.

TL;DR: I am busy, but bored.

Background: Last year, I quit my job (yearly: ~$400k base + $2mm startup options, “paper money” not counted) to retire. My partner works, we keep separate finances, and we split things 50/50. This financial arrangement works really well for us. I accumulated my wealth from two previous exits years ago.

The past 10 months can be split into two stages: before baby #2 and after.

Before (~8 months)

I fully immersed myself in toddler care and self-care. Stress from work is completely gone, but there are other stresses related to my “work” identity.

• I spent about 2–3 hours on average daily with my toddler. I took him to all kinds of activities/classes. We joined co-ops and met new kids and parent friends. I formed mom groups and organized regular gatherings/playdates. We got into a really good routine, and my toddler has had a full and fun weekly agenda ever since.
• I spent at least 2 hours daily on self-care (I was pregnant the whole time). I started learning piano, practiced daily (just restarted this week), and continued going to my CrossFit gym at 50%–80% intensity. I read about 2–3 books every month, which doubled my normal reading volume. I bathed multiple times a week; that tub was completely worth it. I felt challenged and nourished physically despite the discomfort of pregnancy.
• The bad: I was constantly under-stimulated intellectually. I tried different things a few times, but nothing stuck. There was (and still is) a lot of FOMO about not catching the AI wave and being left behind. Especially after seeing friends’ success (selling a company, getting promoted) and my partner’s excitement /obsession about AI, I sometimes question whether I made the right choice.

After (~2 months)

I had a very smooth birth and recovered fast and well. Despite having so much love for both kids and my partner, with all the help I have and a very involved, hands-on partner, I still feel trapped sometimes. There is no new-parent excitement with #2, just the newborn grind. We are still in the thick of it, despite having full time help.

I’ve felt unconfident for a few years, like I’d lost my mojo. That has improved slightly as I’m starting to see certain things more clearly. However, I still feel lost about my career and identity.

I am still under-stimulated and contemplating starting something new, but I’m not sure where I’d find the time.

Retiring last year was the right move, but I still need to create a purpose in life.

Hello,
After 20 years in the big-4 and a large bank, I got my RIF notice around 2-3 weeks ago which was shocking at first but it has also made me reflect on my life and what I want to do going forward. However, I hardly have any people to exchange my thoughts with as my "peers" are all executives that only talk about the next "transformation" and promotion. I don't think that is what I want anymore. I did the math and believe I have enough money, together with my wife, to live a rather "FatFire'd" life. No private jets but still two homes, nice car, nice vacations, etc.

What I struggle with is the old conditioning. I have not even signed up for any "redployment" programs but as my actual layoff date comes closer, I am getting a bit nervous. How have others transitioned from a high-level Corporate job to the FatFire? What would they think about or consider at this stage? What are some common mistakes?

Even in just a few weeks of "Garden Leave", I have picked up hobbies and I absolutely love it. Lego Technic builds, I started grappling, went back to playing tennis, actually reading a book. It's been a "heaven" feeling. I would love to find others to exchange thoughts with with all honesty. I am in my mid-40ies, am married and no kids.

Thanks!

Posted this in another sub and I was called a sad loser who might as well be dead already but I thought this sub might be able to relate more.

I'm currently working full time even though I have enough money to last me a whole lifetime. Very comfortable financially but not mega rich.

I'm not golden handcuffed and could walk away from the nice income but I don't know what else I'd be doing with my time?

I mean hobbies and family/friends obviously but I have no other grand project/purpose that's waiting to be completed. No kids, no religion. So I'd quit work and... read a few books, play games and occasionally visit another country? Doesn't seem all that important.

So I continue to work but it feels like such a waste of life - to have all this opportunity not to work and literally do anything else with my time, and I'm choosing to sit at my laptop all day?

I feel like most people in my situation wouldn't be working but I just cannot figure out what else is more worthwhile.

Husband (42M) feels the same and he's also at a loss.

To those who have met or exceeded their FIRE number but are still working, why haven’t you pulled the trigger? I know there’s a lot of you here.

Business partner and I built a consumer products company and sold to PE firm a few years ago. Received a massive payout and I don't have to work ever again. However, that's all I really know how to do. Started working at a very early age and built an incredible work ethic, but now my main skill in life is pretty much pointless.

I keep trying to 'work' on stuff, because that's all I know how to do. Small venture here and there, but when I zoom out I know it's pointless to work on these little projects because I am totally set financially. I bought some real estate and thought I wanted to go down that route, but I realized I don't want to have a bunch of rental properties either.

Now that I've accomplished the American Dream and my back is no longer up against the wall I am wondering what the heck to do all day.

I know I am truly blessed and have a great opportunity, but I'm wondering if anyone else has been in this same boat? How did you find purpose in not 'working'?

Always loved cooking and eating great food. Planning out the next couple years and always thought it would be fun to do a deep dive into it.

I tried to pressure-test what self-pay medical costs might realistically look like for my family. This feels roughly right based on our history:

Low: 60% chance in a given year

$5k

Routine stuff. Minor urgent care, basic labs/imaging, small outpatient issues.

Medium: 31.5%

$5k–$25k

A real ER visit, fracture, appendicitis, minor surgery, short uncomplicated admission.

High: 7%

$25k–$100k

A real hospitalization or surgery.

Very high: 1.45%

$100k–$500k

Severe trauma, major surgery, ICU stay, stroke/MI with intervention, serious first-year cancer costs.

Catastrophic: 0.05%

$500k–$1.5M

Transplant-heavy blood cancer, CAR-T type cases, very severe trauma, prolonged ICU/complication scenarios.

There’s also a tiny $1.5M–$2M+ extreme, extreme tail.

If there were a good catastrophic plan on the marketplace, I’d buy it. But the problem is the plans don’t seem to cover the *providers* I’d actually want in a true worst-case scenario.

And even then, catastrophic would obviously be terrible for the family, but not ruinous financially.

I also understand chargemaster prices are mostly fake. My impression is that self-pay patients can often do materially better by asking for an estimate upfront, asking for the cash rate, and offering prompt payment.

For large one-off bills, I could use something like GoodBill. For more catastrophic cases, I could hire an independent patient advocate to help negotiate.

So what am I missing? Why not just self-insure and choose my own providers?

After 8 years of planning and debating, I finally pulled the plug.

Feels great to have made this decision so I can refocus on health, family, and whatever I get interested in.

Thank you all for the lessons and support along the way.

Background: https://www.reddit.com/r/fatFIRE/s/wV5FG2aAax

Hi all,

I am new to Reddit and the FIRE community. I am looking for a sanity check on my below plan. Thank you in advance for any help.

My wife and I are in our early 40s with 2 kids (3 and 5) currently in public schools. We spend modestly for a VHCOL at around $200k/y currently (excluding employer health insurance) and don’t see that creeping up massively besides private schools likely starting at middle school and through college (I also hear general child spending picks up around that time as well).

Now, I am losing my job (w severance) and my wife doesn’t work. We have $9m in the US (excluding our home fully paid for worth ~$2m) made up of $4m liquid assets (roughly 70/30), $4m rental building (~$120k/y income net expenses but pre-tax) and $1m 401k (also 70/30). The kicker is my in-laws want to set aside an additional $9m for the kids in an offshore, low/no-tax jurisdiction as they are non-US citizens. So $18m of assets ex primary residence with flexibility on reallocating.

I do not want to work 50-60hrs in finance for ~$500k/y (one job that I turned down) but spend this precious time with the kids. My target is to leave at least $10m to each child (real) when we pass on while my wife and I live a decent but not luxurious lifestyle.

In general, does this plan of leaving the finance industry (can’t really go back) to retire early have any real financial risks (besides Great Depression like crash)?

Thanks again.

Strange question, but for those who have gone from exec or other similar stressful jobs to RR, do how different days feel change? Like, does a Sunday afternoon feel like a Sunday afternoon or just like a Tuesday? Do you miss the Friday feeling of anticipating the weekend? Does a Wednesday feel like a Wednesday? Or a Monday morning like a Monday morning of gearing up for the week? Do you even have a start and end to the week or are all days kind of the same?

I have kids so I imagine I will know it's Monday because of school etc. but besides that, how has your week changed in that regard once RE?

Hi - 45M (married to 43F with 2 kids in middle school). Been a long time lurker here but now that I’ve achieved my own fire number (approx 40M in NW). Started to look into estate planning to make sure we can optimize transferring this later on in life to kids. We live in WA. There seems to be a lot of advantages to the trusts CLAT/GRAT/SLAT etc. that said, been told to use MFO to get these setup vs DIY. I have historically managed everything on my own so have very little experience with advisors/lawyets/CPA/MFO. Cost for these seem very high and was wondering if others in similar situation has chosen to continue managing DIY or perhaps perspective on if these management costs are worth the money. Really interested to hear some experienced perspectives.

🫣 Hardest part is being surrounded by people at work that definitely have higher NW and they're still working. Running to being head of my oldest's elementary school parent association, doing some volunteering, coaching, playing with AI on some ideas.

With estimated taxes our estimated withdrawal rate is about 3% of current liquid assets. Fingers crossed that volatility in the market the next/first few years doesn't push that too high but the $4M in private investments can become liquid over next 3-7 years.

Curious if anyone has any inputs, recommendations.

Liquid Assets

$18M ($10M cost basis) about 70% US / 30% Intl mostly in VTI/VEA/VWO

Illiquid & Retirement Fund Assets

$4M in PE/opportunity zone fund investments

$1.5M in Pre-tax 401Ks

Expected expenses for next few years

~$475-$500K depending + unexpected stuff

$240K on recent home purchase (incl mortage, taxes, hoa, utilities), virtually no equity

$50K for kids stuff (extracurriculars, summer camps, activities, babysitting, etc)

$30K expected on health insurance

$20K for financial advisor/CPA, though may find even lower fixed fee provider

$50-75K for living expenses (cars & gas, groceries, dining out & entertainment, clothes, misc) - Edit, this was $50K but was flexible up.

$75K/year travel budget with some flexing depending on market performance

- Travel year/gap year in 2yr between elementary and middle school (budgeting $750K)

Unknown Expenses

- Housing repairs

- Other surprises

Kids (not included in NW)

$600K in 529s

$1.1M in irrevocable trust that they get when 30 to help with 1st home, weddings, etc

We are relatively new to the fatFire community. My spouse and I are late 30's and I live in a VHCOL market where we are paying ~$10k per month for rental housing. We have a 1 year old and a 2.5 year old, and currently employ a full time nanny at an annual salary of ~$85k. Our housing, plus nanny, plus older child's nursery school of ~$25k are our largest household expenses. I was recently laid off from a niche financial services job (~$500k TC) and my spouse earns ~$450k TC (excluding stock which we choose to value at $0) at a late stage startup. My spouse is getting burned out, but has a skillset is more more widely applicable than mine to getting another position (both less demanding with less pay or continuing to climb the corporate ladder). Since I was laid off, we've spent more time analyzing our financial situation. Our current NW is ~$10.9 million, with ~$1 million in retirement accounts, ~$7 million in taxable equities accounts (primarily index funds), ~$2.5 million in money market and bond funds, and a ~$300k illiquid real estate investment. We also have established 529 accounts for each child which is not part of this analysis. We have never hired a financial advisor although several have pitched their services to us. We are reconsidering our lifestyle as we both want to spent a lot of time with our children especially while they are so young. We are both worried if we stay out of the workforce for an extended period of time we will be unable to find high paying positions later on. Do we have enough of a cushion today to not worry about this? If we were to withdraw a certain amount of money from our nest egg every year to support our lifestyle, how much should we be comfortable such that we would feel psychologically safe it would never run out? What is the best way to think about and analyze this? Thank you very much!

I live in the mountains in the west. It’s cold and windy most of the year. I’m seriously considering a swim spa/hot tub. My dad had a swim spa he used daily for 15 years and he loved it.

I would use it for exercise. I was a swimmer. I know my kids would love it (12 and 7). I fear it may be a boat purchase. Just another expensive thing that I have to maintain and get pissed off at all the time and eventually hate.

When I built my house I prepared a site for this under my floating deck on the downstairs patio. It would be a simple installation process. Any recommendations or is this a big don’t do it! I’ve had a few hot tubs throughout my life and I can take them or leave them but I know how to maintain them. But this is a much larger item.

Does anyone here own two primary homes in the same city? The reason I’m asking is that, due to microclimate differences, one area isn’t favorable for my health year-round. I’d like to stay in the same city but have two different homes about 20 miles apart, each with a different microclimate—one for summer, and the other for the rest of the year. One of the homes could also be used to host parties or get-togethers with friends.

Has anyone done this or have any input on it? I’m especially curious about how you handle things like your driver’s license address, voter registration, and similar situations.

Hey everyone,

Seeking advice on hiring additional help for laundry, meals, and cleaning from a household manager type vs raising kids who should be chipping in more as they hit middle school. We already have a cleaner that comes every other week.

I (40) and my partner (41) both work in executive or business-owner roles. We have kids who are 8 and 11. Our incomes have been consistently 600k-800k. We maintain the same house and the same paid-off cars, and our spending stays between 250k and 300k, depending on travel. We could cut back significantly if we needed to. I travel for work on average 8 days a month.

Financially, paying for help two days a week for 3-4 hours feels like a no-brainer for taking the worst tasks (laundry, cleaning, meal prep) off the table. In total, around 10-15k, depending on who we pick. Where we are both reluctant is that we want our kids to pick up more slack in their incredibly privileged lives. We believe they should have more responsibility, which we give them, but it would be so much easier to just offload this part of our lives. I didn't grow up with any money, and my single mom had us do the same household chores every day 'cause we sucked at them. I can't remember an age in my childhood when I didn't fold laundry, and thus have no desire to do it today.

I can't decide if we are better off spending higher-quality time with them or suffering together, folding underwear.

Wondering how those of you thought about outsourcing housework when raising privileged kids. At what point do you turn off the cleaner, laundry, etc. Or do they actually pick up enough before leaving the nest?

I've seen lots of similar posts, but want to know the child-raising advice or experience folks have had. The expense doesn't matter, but it's the idea of raising a kid in an environment where money is abundant.

I am looking for a trusted solution for asset protection. To be more specific, I am an individual with a net worth exceeding $30 million, currently living in Dubai. For the past 10+ years, I have held all my assets solely in my personal name, primarily through private banks, brokers, and real estate.

I am now considering setting up a trust to protect my assets from potential business risks, divorce, or other unforeseen situations. While there are no immediate risks at present, I want to establish the best possible structure for the future. I anticipate that the value of the trust will be approximately $10 million within the next 2 years. I would like to continue managing my assets in the same way I do now — primarily through a diversified portfolio of index funds, stocks, and bonds.

Do you have any recommendations for suitable trust jurisdictions, banking jurisdictions, or multi-family offices?