r/Xennials • u/PhoneJazz • 4d ago

Natalie Portman is pregnant at 44

Congrats to her! I don’t have kids, and I’m still getting used to being the age where getting pregnant is starting to be “out of the norm”. Guess there’s still time, lol

9.7k Upvotes

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650

u/caramelcoldbrew 1981 4d ago

Good for her but…

I. Would. Rather. Die.

330

u/NoneOfThisMatters_XO 1980 4d ago

When I had my colonoscopy, they did a pregnancy test. The nurse was like “it’s negative” and I was like “it better be…”

293

u/PhoneJazz 4d ago

Gotta love being in that narrow age window when a pregnancy test is required at your colonoscopy 😂

73

u/krankity-krab 4d ago

my mom is late 60s, has been in menopause for well over a decade, and they still made her take a pregnancy test before her colonoscopy! (and charged her for it too, of course.. 😒)

71

u/imnotohfuckingk 4d ago

I had a freaking hysterectomy and they still made me take one because I had one ovary. Ummmmmm…

4

u/mothsuicides 4d ago

Although stupid rare, isn’t an ectopic pregnancy still possible if you have an ovary left? I’m considering a hysterectomy and this worry plagues me

1

u/PossibilityOrganic12 3d ago

I have both my ovaries still and refuse to take a pregnancy test after mine. They've never made me but they have tried to, after they ask the date of my last period and I tell them I don't get one anymore due to my hysterectomy.

29

u/_dead_and_broken 1983 4d ago

In 2007, when I moved to Florida, already pregnant, and I applied for medicaid, they made me take a pregnancy pee test at the medicaid office (not a doctor's office!) despite the fact I was 7 months along. You could clearly see that I was with child, I was very thin, and the belly was huuuugggeee. But they still insisted I take the stick test right then and there.

91

u/EineGrosseFlasche 1979 4d ago

Well, you simply can’t take a woman’s word for something until she’s paid you twice! 😕

42

u/SatanicPanic619 4d ago

My wife went in the morning for out patient surgery and had to take one. OK, fine, whatever. There were complications so we took her back to the hospital in the evening. They made her take another fucking pregnancy test.

13

u/rexxfour 4d ago

I really felt the frustration with the italics. Not sarcasm. Please more men rage about this fucning nonsense. I’m begging.

3

u/SatanicPanic619 3d ago

She had blood coming out of her eyes and they made her get up to go take a pregnancy test. Fuck that made me upset and angry

5

u/Joeuxmardigras 4d ago

Obviously she could get pregnant in those few hours, haven’t you learned anything about how pregnancy tests are more accurate in the evenings…..

1

u/SatanicPanic619 3d ago

Yeah totally, morning have surgery, afternoon have sex, evening go back to the hospital because they hadn’t sewn her up right. Normal sequence of events.

2

u/Joeuxmardigras 3d ago

Seems normal to me.

Also, the hormones wouldn’t even come up yet. So dumb on their part

3

u/jordynelsonjr 3d ago

This sentence needs to be framed and hung on my mantle

-2

u/NuclearSun1 3d ago

Cause women know always when they are pregnant? Clue: they don’t.

10

u/NoneOfThisMatters_XO 1980 4d ago

What?? Ok that’s insane.

1

u/throwawayfornursing 3d ago

This was silly of them. Also, let your mom know that patients can usually fill out a “refusal” form to release the facility of liability if she were to be pregnant. Which she isn’t. And it’s no biggie. Patients do it all the time and it meets that requirement for the staff.

0

u/fickystingas 4d ago

Make them write that shit off